vfowler blog

Recently my wife had a miscarriage. We both learnt a lot from the rather traumatic experience. There were many occasions though that information was lacking. We gained a lot of general knowledge on the topic through talking with friends and family. Mostly for the purposes of studying The Internet and Everyday Life, I am now using the Internet to find out more about early pregnancy miscarriage, and perhaps our particular case. I am interested to compare the information I can find on websites with what we received from doctors in the Emergency Department at Box Hill Hospital.

As usual, things often start with a plain (non-phrasal) Google search. http://www.google.com.au/search?q=early+pregnancy+miscarriage Inspecting the top 10 results, it is not surprising to see that most are from *.com.au and *.com domains. None of the sites have a high popularity rank, except the Wikipedia and miscarriage.about.com entries, which rank #7 and #71 respectively. Next I refined my search to include the terms gestational and sac, i.e. http://www.google.com.au/search?q=early+pregnancy+miscarriage+gestational+sac which yielded some concrete results. Carefully reading the description meta data in the search results, lead me to learn about blighted ova as the possible type of miscarriage.

In the course of this research project, my knowledge of the topic has broadened, but mostly consolidated and confirmed what the doctors explained to us. However, given the lack of information given to us on basic pregnancy procedures from the general practitioners, who initially confirmed the pregnancy and gave a subsequent consultation, I would highly recommend first time pregnancy partners do their own homework on this, particularly through the first trimester and even before attempting to become pregnant. Things such as knowing exact dates can aid in diagnosis.

On the topic of early pregnancy miscarriage, I would recommend choosing sites which:

• give factual information and not opinions,
• detail relevant dates that the information was last updated / published,
• contain information that is independently reviewed by a recognisable authority,
• and contain articles sourced from credible sources.

There are several Q&A advice sites, but none I looked into contained the specific information I was after. Mamapedia™ appears a good community, sharing the wisdom of moms. This site does have a section on miscarriage, which provides useful links from around the web, such as Talking to Children About Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss at *.about.com, but the taxonomy is too limited for my search purposes.

Two most useful sites I explored are http://miscarriage.about.com/ (particularly the series of 7 pages titled Understanding Early Pregnancy / First Trimester Ultrasound Results), and http://www.americanpregnancy.org/pregnancycomplications/miscarriage.html. The former is great for giving accurate information on what to expect under normal circumstances and where the science and technology is at in determining diagnoses. Terminology is explained well and essential diagrams aid comprehension. The latter website, although recommending advice through intermediaries, also gives a good general overview with symptoms, causes and treatment options for miscarriage, as well as (in an apomediary role) refer helpful web sites that address miscarriage.

References

Online, we can create, nurture, maintain, and even cease relationships. In some instances these may be easier processes than their off-line equivalents. And it seems popular, with teens at least, to do a little of both. (Pascoe, n.d.)

How far would a partner/spouse have to go online before it is considered cheating?
Cheating needs to be defined by the intimate partners and although there is a general perception of what it means, individuals will have degrees of difference. Here are a couple of definitions worth examining.

4. to practice fraud or deceit: She cheats without regrets.
7. Informal . to be sexually unfaithful (often fol. by on ): Her husband knew she had been cheating all along. He cheated on his wife.
(Dictionary.com Unabridged)

How far can one go online under these definitions of cheating?

Briefly, the fourth definition above makes it as easy as lying or deceiving via some form of online communication, to the detriment of a partner/spouse relationship. Although broad, worth consideration for the nature of such deceit to come out through Facebook for instance. Nonetheless, surely such fraud must be deliberate before being considered cheating.

Under the seventh definition however, to cheat on one’s partner or spouse in a cyber-sex fashion could be termed polyandry as in having two or more mates [...] successively (Dictionary.com Unabridged). Apart from cultures that tolerate polygamy or polyamory, none would disagree that this would be cheating. The issue here is that such relationships are enacted without the knowledge and consent of all partners concerned (Wikipedia, The Free Encyclopedia). Thus to engage in any form of cyber-sex with a partner other than one’s spouse (in monogamous partnerships), is to be sexually unfaithful and probably break a vow of marriage.

Up to what point is flirting online acceptable?
Provided it is reciprocated, flirting between one another is accepted, and possibly expected, particularly in the early stages of a relationship. In the online world, this seems no different to me. Reciprocation deems acceptance, whether it be sending instant messages or posting private messages through the Internet. Depending on the individuals, perhaps even posting comments to public spaces is also acceptable. There isn’t any stage in a relationship that makes flirting between intimate partners unacceptable. It simply migrates to off-line forms when those involved can spend enough time face-to-face.

Cyber-sex is real
The term immediately makes me think of the scene from The Lawnmower Man where he and some token girl get hooked up. Although the characters’ real bodies don’t have intercourse with each other, their virtual representations or avatars, seem to. An interesting portrayal of how real cyber-sex could be. Given any sexual activity whatsoever, presumably involving at least one individual, and the Internet, you’ve met the requirements for cyber-sex, then I would say it is very real. How can it not be real?

References

• cheating. (n.d.). Dictionary.com Unabridged. Retrieved October 22, 2010, from Dictionary.com website: http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/cheating
• Leonard, B. (1992). IMDb Video: The Lawnmower Man. Retrieved from http://www.imdb.com/video/screenplay/vi4119789849/
• Pascoe, C. (n.d.). Final Report: Intimacy. DIGITAL YOUTH RESEARCH. Retrieved September 12, 2010, from http://digitalyouth.ischool.berkeley.edu/book-intimacy
• Polyamory. (2010, October 22). In Wikipedia, The Free Encyclopedia. Retrieved 05:45, October 23, 2010, from http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Polyamory&oldid=392138336
• polyandry. (n.d.). Dictionary.com Unabridged. Retrieved October 22, 2010, from Dictionary.com website: http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/polyandry

Implications of the rise of casual and social games on the Internet for online gaming and everyday life

For our purposes, casual games are asynchronous and the interaction involves turn-taking as opposed to real-time games. The stress levels are inherently lower and players can take their time to nurture relationships. Social games are those where people come together. They can include cooperative play modes or a free for all. Broadly speaking, any game you play with other people is a social game. Some online examples of these types of games are World of Warcraft, the forthcoming Age of Empires Online, and the super-popular Happy Farm.

There are a total of 228 million active users, 23 million daily users… Approximately 15 million urban white-collars workers are estimated to spend more than five hours a day on Happy Farm. Because of its popularity, the game’s host, Tencent QQ, has capped the number of new players per day at 2 million. (“Happy Farm – Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia,” n.d.)

So many people are playing, and some are paying real money to advance their competitiveness. Certain features can be purchased with game points but others, such as food for a virtual guard dog, require players to reach for their wallets. Unfortunately all this play has several more drawbacks.

Some fear that this new social farming revolution may not contribute to the positive development of society. A central feature of social farm games in China is stealing vegetables. Official state media People’s Daily reports that 70 percent of users on Kaixin001 cite it as their favorite feature, and it has even spawned the popular phrase “How many vegetables have you stolen today?” This key addictive feature has created news stories of business executives “obsessed” with stealing vegetables and broken relationships over vegetables stolen on the night shift. The game is so addictive — with players setting alarm clocks at all hours of the night to check crops — that it 
“destroys jobs and relationships.” “Simplicity and stickiness are behind the global epidemic of farm games. Anyone can learn to grow crops within minutes and reap a reward for getting friends — or the entire office — addicted too,” said BloggerInsight Co-Founder Lucas Englehardt. (Ng, 2009)

A possible grim outcome of this is a gang of unemployed, disgruntled, and love-lost people sneaking around China and stealing from “friends”! Meanwhile, around the corner in population dense Seoul, broadband Internet connections are everywhere and fast. The effect of this infrastructure is to dramatically reduce the problems associated with internet gaming and online content distribution. (Brooks, 2008) A good thing considering that gaming is a mainstream activity in Korean culture, without any guilt strings attached. What about Australia and our plans for the National Broadband Network? Like the US, we simply don’t have the centralised population that Seoul has. With a better network though, will we become gamers to the same extent? Personally I hope Australian culture would never condone such poor behaviour and its consequences.

References